Mentalization Based Treatment Training Video with Anthony Bateman - Equivalence transcript

so going back to that Court user I mean what was what was she up to God I don't know she really nearly ruined it for me actually yeah like I said and thankfully I was not going to let her get one over on me before I even got in there but yeah now she was basically she was basically like the people in the courtroom she was basically just trying to W me up before I even got in there and I could tell actually as soon as I walked in the room she just really unhelpful you know cuz I I I don't know the procedure in these things yeah I literally just how did you know so sure she was trying to work you out I could just see it in her face actually what was about her face yeah what was it what she you just know with some people like you just know that they're really like they just like sour and bitter and old and sad and basically just want to ruin your life too and I could tell because there was so many things that she could have helped me with like I said she showed me the wrong plan for example she gave me no information she could see that I was actually quite nervous and like it's not a nice situation for anyone to be in just to be sat outside and not told anything how do you deal with a sad pushed woman like that you know I mean cuz well I just didn't I just didn't even want to talk to her like why should I try and be nice to her if it's her job supposedly is to make me feel particularly if she's trying to work you up and make you feel bad well exactly that's exactly um and basically I think it's in everyone's interest basically for them for for me not to get my how did you control your mind in this to sort of not react to that well I basically just I it was like a really small room and like her little office was kind of like right next to it so I basically just like I just kind of tried to keep my space yeah in like on the seat kind of thing I just tried not to like make ey contact with and not to kind of not to let her get to me that's what she wanted she just wanted to get inside my head but um but I just you know I really Rain rained it all in before I even got in there and just I just didn't even look at her and going off you know what about the other people in the court there other people who were a bit more helpful here or had different motives and they're all sour pushers like this you know that's sort of I think it's in all of their interests what it's in the Barr's interest for this just to keep going because they keep getting paid so they don't want me to give get my baby back any of them really like they'll get paid either way and they just want it to continue like CU I mean they don't give a [ __ ] any of them it's not that's not their lives it's just a bit of paperwork for them it's just it's just their job yeah they walk away from it at the end at the end of the day yeah I don't yeah I mean you're left with the whole sort of feeling about it aren't you it's your child yeah yeah absolutely my whole [ __ ] life yeah yeah yeah sorry did I say something dumb there no it's just really obvious think yeah it is it's your life yeah it wasn't so obvious that they're all going to me that they're all going to be sort of working you up you know that I can see that you feel worked up you get no information gives you the wrong report and so on it's been this is like the fourth the fourth date yeah may even the fifth time it keeps being canc they cancel it yeah so no don't feel particularly like anyone's on your side no no that that I can see yeah okay but you managed this whole sense that she was a sad puss who was going yeah yeah and she's probably just a bitter old woman who doesn't want anyone else to be happy in the thought of me you know getting my child back yeah probably makes her feel sick so no I wasn't going to let her get that over on me yeah no way oh I see so it's her getting it over on you which the thing that you managed to yeah I me what kind of job is that anyway like of course she's bitter yeah yeah of course what and what way of course she's got a dry job really dry you know he wants to work in like a court like he wants to be an usher seriously just so you can kind of like live off other people's pain no one want have a sense that she was I think she's probably yeah not interested really yeah exactly yeah right okay definitely is she more not interested than just trying to work you up I mean where where is she in that sort of I think she actively was no she she definitely was she was actively trying to work me up but like I said you know me three months ago maybe mhm but it came across to me that you know maybe she just wasn't interested as you were talking then you know she just wasn't kind of no I think she was do you yeah you know she definitely she defitely like she had like a reason to be like that that wasn't just like yeah you know her not caring all right right [ __ ] [ __ ] did you say yeah yeah okay I suppose I said I'd be honest about these things you know in a way it just occurred to me whether or not you were in that situation cuz that I could really understand were quite sensitive as well you know cuz you're pretty sensitive you're trying to hold things together yeah but I think you would be in the same absolutely I would be yeah sure so that's not me being over sensitive I didn't say over sensitive did I said sensitive yeah not over sensitive but by saying that I'm sensitive that's kind of that makes it sound like a bad thing okay all right okay I can see that I didn't quite mean it like that yeah yeah you wouldn't really know unless you were there no sure not very nice