SP Hot & Cold Stops Here | Law Of Assumption transcript

In this video, I'm going to teach you how to break the hot and cold cycle with your SP, your specific person. If you are someone who is manifesting their specific person and you are experiencing this dynamic of hot and cold, push and pull, one day they're in, they're coming in hot, they're giving you everything you want, they love you, they're promising you things, maybe even they're planning the future with you, and then the next day or the next week or sometime after that, they pull their energy back again and they become distant again and they become cold again and you are stuck in this cycle.

You've gone through this cycle several times already and you don't know how to break this pattern, then this video today is for you. Because in today's video, I'm going to explain to you first of all why you're creating this hot and cold dynamic with your SP. Spoiler alert, it comes from your insecurity. That's where it originates. Second, of course, I'm going to teach you how to break this cycle once and for all. How to become the secure version of yourself and sustain that version.

And as I often do, I'm also going to give you some practical tips on how to sustain that state of security and how to make security your identity, your dominant state. Before I begin, hello and welcome. My name is Christina from Empowered Creator. I am a mindset and conscious manifesting teacher and coach and this is my YouTube channel. Here I talk about all things law of assumption, mindset, conscious manifesting, the quantum universe and a lot more.

And my goal is to simplify everything without the fluff. So, if you guys like this content and you would like to see more of it, I would love it if you would subscribe to this channel, comment on this video, like it, share it, hype it, and stick around. Also, if you need help with your specific situation, I offer one-on-one coaching as well as custom subliminals for whatever needs you may have. I also have some self-study courses about manifesting your specific person.

And I do have a membersonly channel with a lot of perks for members, including weekly live workshops with a different manifesting topic each week, weekly live group coaching, a lot of exclusive content, monthly challenges for a chance to win a free one-on-one coaching session with me, and a lot more. So, if you're interested in any of these services, the links are below in the description box. Click on them, and they're going to take you to my website or to the membership channel.

With all that being said, let's dive into today's video. So, in today's video, we're not actually going to be changing your SP from being hot and cold to being only hot. What we are going to do instead, which is going to cause your SP to change, it is going to prompt your SP to change, is teach you how to become your secure version. the secure version of yourself who knows that they already have the relationship. So first of all, let's briefly explain the dynamic of hot and cold.

Why are you creating hot and cold in your relationship with your SP? Why are you stuck in this cycle and in this pattern? The answer is actually quite simple. We have said many many times that your SP, your specific person always mirrors your dominant state. What your dominant state means is who you dominantly are within. What is your dominant vibration that you're projecting outwards? So, if you're constantly oscillating within yourself between they love me and they don't care about me, they're ignoring me, they're pulling their energy back, they're becoming distant again, and you are emotionally reacting to it with panic, with fear, with trying to pull them closer again or perhaps with playing games, perhaps giving them the silent treatment, going no contact just to see how they're going to react.

All of these reactions are emotional reactions and they come from fear of abandonment. They come from hyperfocusing on them as the [clears throat] source of your happiness and they come from an inconsistent self-concept. So all of this all of this emotional dynamic within yourself creates this pattern of oscillation and this pattern of constant wavering. One day you feel they love me, they want me, yes, I have them. The next day something happens.

Maybe they take longer to respond to a text. Maybe they said they call you back and they don't or they call you much later or they call you the next day. Maybe they don't respond to your call. Something happens that you interpret as them pulling back and then the panic sets in again. The fear sets in again. The trauma sets in again. And so if you're in the process of manifesting your SP, the thing that you need to realize here is that you are not manifesting from power.

You're not manifesting from empowerment, which is ideally where you want to be manifesting from. Instead, you are trying to manifest them from panic. And so what ends up happening and what you tend to do usually is that as soon as you perceive them pulling away again, whether that is true and real or whether it's perceived, whether it's an interpretation and a projection of your own fear onto them. In any event, your mind and your nervous system perceives them as going away from you again, leaving you again, abandoning you again, and you get into that panic and into that anxiety mode.

So then what you you tend to do usually is that you start affirming like crazy to bring them back. You start to spiral. You start to overthink every little detail of your last interaction. you start perhaps stalking their social media and then you're affirming or visualizing or scripting or whatever it is that you're doing even harder. But all of this you guys, you need to realize comes from a place of fear. It comes from a place of panic.

You are trying to fix something with your manifesting. And so you end up waiting there for their breadcrumbs. You end up waiting there for their one text. And when it does come, you feel happy. You feel rewarded. you feel reassured for a little bit until the cycle starts again. So if you don't want to stay stuck in a cycle like this, which presumably you don't, the first thing that you need to realize is that this is coming out of fear.

And you are manifesting your SP from a place of fear, from a place of panic, from a place of anxiety, and from a place of trying to fix the 3D. Very, very important to remember. So if you are one of these people and I know many many people are like that. So I'm not saying this to make you feel ashamed of yourself or make you beat yourself down. I am saying all of this to help you realize your patterns so that you can start shifting them into something healthier and something more secure.

Okay. But if you are one of these people who when their SP pulls away, you start panicking and you start getting into behaviors like you're constantly checking your phone every minute, every 2 minutes, every 5 minutes for a text, for a call, whatever. You start looking at their social media all the time. You start, like we said, overanalyzing their behavior, your interaction. Maybe I said something wrong. Maybe I said something that offended them. what happened again?

I thought we were good. That sort of thing. Trying to overanalyze and over scrutinize every little detail of what went down in your latest interactions. And then you go into affirming or trying to manifest in order to fix something in the 3D in order to fix their behavior to pull them back in. Perhaps you're overanalyzing their tone. Definitely and certainly you are making them responsible for your mood. In other words, you are allowing your moods to be dictated by what they did, how they behaved, how they showed up, and so on.

Also, inevitably, in this way, you are making them the center of your day and the center of your life. You are pulling your energy away from yourself and putting it all on this SP. So this you guys is the anxious emotional pattern that tends to create that hot and cold dynamic, that push and pull dynamic that you so hate, that has so hurt you probably over and over that you are desperate to stop and you still cannot seem to bring yourself to stop.

So how do you actually stop it? First of all, before I go deeper into the how and how you create that secure attachment and that secure um nervous system and secure identity within yourself, the thing that you want to realize first and foremost if you are one of those people who engages in patterns, behavioral patterns and emotional patterns like the ones I just described is that if you truly were in a secure, committed, loving relationship with this SP be you would not be behaving in this way.

How would you be behaving instead? Chances are you would not be obsessing over them. Chances are you would not be so overinvesting in them and instead you would be investing in yourself, in your own growth, in your own interests, in your own hobbies, in your own life, in your own development, in your own evolution as a person, in your own goals, in your own well-being, physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and so on.

You would be instead living your life. In other words, giving yourself a full life. And yes, they would be a part of your life. They would be a part of it. They would be a part of everything. But you would also have a life outside of them. Why? Because you would be securely in this committed relationship with them. So you wouldn't need to be worrying about it every single minute. That is the simple reason. So you would be living your life.

You would be giving yourself a full life. You would be investing in yourself and very very important you would be calm. You would be secure. You would be safe. You would be reassured. You would trust them. You would trust the relationship. You would trust the connection. And so this is you guys the state where we want to return you to because this is your natural state. This is the normal state of the wish fulfilled, living from the end, however you want to call it.

And this is the state that ultimately is going to help you break that pattern and that cycle of hot and cold, push and pull and so on. So the key realization I want you to have here before I move on to the next section of this video is that you are trying to manifest this person. You are trying to manifest stability in the relationship while at the same time embodying the fear of losing them as opposed to embodying that stability.

And this is why this hot and cold is being created. And so if we are then shifting you into that version of you who is secure, who feels secure about this relationship, what would you be doing instead in terms of your emotional investment, in terms of your behavior? I already talked about some of these things. But in addition to those, you wouldn't be someone who is chasing, right? You wouldn't be someone who is overinvesting, especially if that investment comes at a cost for yourself and that investment goes into the other person and takes away from you.

You wouldn't be doing that. You wouldn't be someone who is constantly checking the 3D, constantly checking their phone, constantly checking the SP social media, constantly trying to control every little detail and every little situation, constantly monitoring, constantly worrying, constantly wondering. You get the gist, right? And of course, you wouldn't be someone who begs energetically and also in the 3D. However, let me put a disclaimer here because even if you're not doing anything in the 3D, even if you're not talking to them, you're not chasing them in the 3D, you're not texting them, you're not calling them, if you are still reacting emotionally inside about all this, being triggered, spiraling, doing all the things that I just discussed, your energetic output and your energetic blueprint still finds them, still reaches them.

They still feel it subconsciously. They still feel that desperate, obsessed energy from you. And that is what they respond to and that is what they mirror to you. So as you're now shifting to the secure you, the secure version of yourself, who is that person? You are most likely a person who expects consistency from their SP. Expects it, not begs for it. There is a big difference between the two. And you also have standards.

And you're not afraid of speaking up about these standards. I'm not talking about starting an argument. I'm not talking about playing games. I'm talking about very clearly, very calmly explaining what is acceptable to you and what isn't acceptable to you. Or if you're not going to explain it, you can show it with your actions. So a secure person is going to have standards, is not going to tolerate any and all behaviors and at the same time though they do expect consistency from their SP.

Also that secure person does feel loved and does feel prioritized and they embody that in how they show up in their 3D and in their relationship and in their connection with that SP. Because remember what we said, you don't manifest a relationship by wanting it. You manifest a relationship by becoming the version of you who feels genuinely secure in that relationship. It's all in your vibration. It's all in your energy, you guys.

So, who did we say this secure person is? A person who has standards, a person who expects consistency, a person who feels loved and chosen, a person who feels prioritized, knows that they deserve to be prioritized and they prioritize themselves. Now, let's talk about a little bit about what all this means and how all this translates in practical terms. How would you show up in practical terms as that secure version of yourself?

So, I'm going to give you a few steps here just to make it a little simpler and a little easier to understand. Step one, you withdraw the emotional overinvestment on your SP. Now, that doesn't mean ignoring them. That doesn't mean playing games. That doesn't mean giving them the silent treatment. What it does actually mean in practical terms is that you don't make them the whole and the sole source of your happiness and also that you don't react to every little micro shift that you see in them.

Oh, they usually text me good morning and good night and one day they didn't text me good morning or they didn't text me good night and that is a huge crisis all of a sudden. Oh my god, they're starting to withdraw. they are starting to pull away again. Don't make that mean that. Don't give it that meaning. Okay? They usually respond to me right away. Well, this one day they took an hour or two hours to respond and all of a sudden that must mean something.

News flash, you guys. It doesn't have to mean anything. It's you who gives the meaning to everything and anything that happens in your 3D. So, simply don't give it that meaning. And of course, you don't want to make them the sole source of your happiness. That means you give yourself a full life, things to be happy about, things to be excited about, things to feel fulfilled about in various other aspects of your life, whatever resonates with each one of you.

And stop making your SP the center of your life. Stop planning your life around them. Stop making plans around them. Make your own plans as well. Stop dropping your schedule, changing your schedule just to accommodate them or just to have a chance to see them a little longer or have a chance to spend more time with them. And for that, you drop the rest of your life pretty much. Stop doing that. Stop making them the center of your life and the center of your attention.

Trust me here. Step number two, shift the focus and the attention back on yourself. If you knew that they were committed to you, that they were stable in their love for you and in their intentions for you. If you knew that you were loved and you were chosen and you were wanted and you were committed to, who would you be? How would you be showing up instead? In practical terms, what would I do for myself today? I know my SP is committed to me.

So, what would I do? What would I focus on building for myself? How would I focus on my own growth? How would I focus on my own interests and my own goals? What would I improve perhaps about myself? What would I enjoy? What would I do to bring my heart a little more joy? What would I do to feel more fulfilled outside of my SV? This is what we mean when we talk about shifting your energy back to yourself. So then you figure that out and you go ahead and do it.

It's not just about learning what I have to do, what I need to do. The biggest part of it is actually doing it. Actually modifying those behaviors of yours. Actually modifying the ways in which you show up in the 3D. This is the biggest step in shifting your identity. This is the biggest step into becoming naturally the new person, the new version of yourself that you so desperately want to create. Okay. Step number three, stabilize your new identity and your self-concept.

We said earlier in this video that a lot of this push and pull dynamic, a lot of this hot and cold originates in an inconsistent self-concept. Well, you want your self-concept to become very very consistent. Who are you as the person who knows without a doubt that they are loved, that they are chosen, that they are wanted, that they are prioritized, that they they are worth being committed to, and so on and so forth.

Who is this person? How do they embody that identity in their day-to-day life? That's who you want to become. And if it helps you to affirm for it, if it helps you to visualize for it or script for it or meditate on it, by all means, go ahead and do it. The thing I'm going to um draw your attention to here and the little caveat that I'm going to present is that it's best if you do this from a calm, regulated, balanced nervous system.

It's best if you are doing your manifesting techniques, if you are doing manifesting techniques from a place of calm. Absolutely not a place of panic, not a place of fear where you are constantly and anxiously affirming to try to fix something in the 3D. That is when manifestation techniques don't actually work. So you want to be in a balanced regulated nervous system. You want to be calm and you can affirm from there.

You can meditate from there. You can script from there and so on. Remember what you're doing is you are rehearsing consistently that new identity of yours. And that new identity of yours needs consistency. It needs persistence. It needs firmness, a firmness of decision. It needs a strong willingness to actually go there mentally and emotionally. Be that person, become that person mentally and emotionally and in the ways in which you show up in the 3D.

And so this is how you stabilize your identity and your self-concept. So any techniques that you are doing or any behaviors that you're engaging in from a place of needing to control things from a place of fear and panic and from a place of trying to fix things in the 3D you need to realize that all of this comes from a place of lack. All of this comes from a place of I don't have it. And so if you want to shift into the identity who is secure, who does have it, who knows that they have it, who knows that they don't have to worry about it, then you start cutting out these behaviors from your life.

You stop trying to control things and instead you stabilize yourself within. You become secure. You rest in that calmness and in that security. And you know, and you expect that good things are going to come your way. and that the energy and the dynamic with your SV is going to stabilize. You rest in that certainty and because when you stop grasping for it and when you stop gripping so tightly this is when your energy stabilizes and as such this is when you start manifesting the dynamic that you actually want with your person.

You need to draw some firm energetic boundaries both towards your person but also towards yourself. In other words, when you catch yourself starting to spiral, when you catch yourself starting to react to whatever it is that they're doing in the 3D that you don't like, you need to train yourself to stop making that a cause for your spiral. You need to train yourself to not be so affected by it, not be so touched by it.

What? They took two hours to respond to my text. They said they would call and they didn't. Okay, whatever. I'm going to ring my friend and go out and have a good time. This is the attitude. This is the energetic shift we're talking about in practical terms. At the same time, you don't want to be rewarding them in the 3D for any behavior that you wouldn't normally tolerate. So, if they're truly being disrespectful, if they truly are not putting in the effort, if they truly are showing very hot and cold, very lukewarm behavior, well, that's not enough to impress you.

That's not enough to gain your attention. And again, we don't mean playing the silent treatment with them, playing games, playing hard to get, ignoring them, or anything like that. We mean genuinely giving your attention and your focus to other things and not being so affected by what they may be doing or what they may not be doing. If they disappear for a week and then they just send a text saying, "Hey, what's up? What are you up to?" Well, that's not enough to impress you, is it?

Cuz you do have high standards. So, you can respond in the same tone or you cannot respond at all. But the difference here is, and that's why I called it an energetic boundary. It's not that you are really really upset by their lack of effort and you're playing a game with them in the hopes that they will understand and they will change and they'll modify their behavior. No, what you're doing is that you're genuinely put off by that behavior.

You're genuinely not engaging with that behavior. Genuinely, that is the key word. you go and do other things instead and you focus your attention onto other things instead because they give you more joy and more happiness than this SV behavior. This is the energetic boundary both to them and to you. Like I said, you don't allow them to make you spiral with their behavior. You don't allow them to upset you. You don't allow their behavior to touch you.

Why? Well, because you deserve the best. And frankly, you have many other better things to do than dealing with their lack of consistency and their lack of effort. So this is you guys how you set those energetic boundaries both in the 3D and most importantly within yourself. And let me also give you some practical tips as I promised in the beginning of this video for how to sustain that identity of security. How to sustain that identity of I know that I have them and so I don't have to worry about it.

First of all, especially if you are still in that energy of wavering, in that energy of worrying a lot, in that energy of getting anxious a lot, you want to take at least a few minutes a day to stabilize your inner state and embody that secure version of yourself. How does that person respond to their environment, to the 3D, to what happens in the 3D, to other people's behavior, to my ESP's behavior? Who am I as that person?

As that secure person you also want to, it might help you to visualize or affirm or whatever technique you're doing, do it from a place of calmness and stability as opposed to a place of a lot of intensity. A lot of people do that when they're manifesting their SP. They tend to make their affirmations and they make their visualizations or their scripting come from a place of very intense emotion. The truth is though, you guys, that if you were in a secure, committed, loving, long-term relationship with your SP, which is what you're manifesting, you wouldn't be talking about intensity.

You would be talking about stability. So you want to be visualizing, affirming, meditating, and ultimately feeling from a place of stability, from a place of security. So keep that in mind as well. If you happen to be triggered, you want to take a little pause there and ask yourself, okay, how would the secure version of myself respond to this? Respond mainly and mostly internally and then also perhaps externally. Also remember when you're doing your manifesting practice, you want to be focusing on embodying identity.

I am loved. I am chosen. I am wanted. I am committed to. And how do I feel that security of that person? How do I feel as that person? As opposed to affirming, oh, they text me all the time. They call me every single day. They call me 50 times a day. This is not what you want to be focusing on. You want to be focusing on the version of you who is securely in a relationship with their specific person and how that feels within yourself.

And so the big takeaway from this video is this. You become the secure version of you when you stop abandoning yourself every time they pull back or they give you some behavior that you don't like and instead pull that energy back into yourself. You invest in yourself. You love yourself. You take care of yourself mentally, emotionally, physically and so on. You stop spiraling. You do the best for yourself. You prioritize yourself.

You stop being triggered to the best of your ability. And by doing all of these, you're not abandoning yourself. So, you're creating a dynamic where you are eliminating the possibilities and you're eliminating the risk of your SP also abandoning you. Every time you're reacting and every time you become so upset and triggered and you're spiraling over behaviors that you don't like, you are abandoning yourself for them.

No. From now on, you're going to be pulling your energy back into yourself. And in this way, because they are your mirror, they are going to be conforming to that. If you keep abandoning yourself for them, you create this hated dynamic where they keep abandoning you as well. Once you stop abandoning yourself, guess what happens? They stop abandoning you as well. With all that being said, I'm going to wrap up this video here.

I intend that this has helped. As always, I very much appreciate you guys being on this channel, watching this content. I love making this content for you. And as always, I look forward to seeing you all at the next video. Until then, take care and bye-bye.